I always get the strangest looks when I tell people how many best friends I have (seven by the way) as if I stated I had 7 kids at one time, or 7 jobs, or have 7 outstanding tickets. What’s the big deal? So what, I have SEVEN individuals that I can confidently say I trust and would protect with my life. Maybe it’s the fact that solid female friendship are few and far in between these days. Or the idea of having multiple best friends means that you are naïve and trusting with anyone. THAT, my friend, is absolutely not the case. I have ACCUMULATED these friends over 29 years and they didn’t just pop up last Tuesday (like some friendships I have witnessed that we shall not speak of). I have a solid 10 years at least with each of them and numerous stories to date.
I’ve lost count how many hours in a day, a week, a year that I have cried, laughed until I was in tears or spent weekends at a time with them only to go home, and pick the phone to talk to them. I am always tickled pink when receiving calls that begin with a “guhllll let me tell you,” followed by random “yasss'”used ad nauseum. It amazes me how your friends turn into your family and become a part of who you are. Whoever thought that someone could actually enter your life and alter your identity? One day you are just the daughter, and BOOM now I am the wife, the mother, the best friend to….you get my drift.
I remember entering into college and meeting my current best friends. We spent every waking minute together, took class together, ate lunch together, clubbed together, heck at one point we even pushed our twin beds together in our dorm and shared one bed for a while. ** I know that part was a bit extreme don’t judge me. Nonetheless, our identities darn near meshed into one person. People on campus began to run our names into one long name and if we were alone they’d stare and wonder why we looked “different”…trying to figure out what/who was missing.
Of course, after four years that little college bubble that allows you to see the same people every day and know at least 70% of everyone’s business by default eventually POPS. But if it’s a solid friendship from the start, you will find that no job, state or person can come in between what you have…except for maybe one….a Husband!
Let’s be real, if the lifestyles that my “squad” chose to live was one that involved the same sex then heck we’d be married right now fa’ sho! BUT- it is most definitely NOT and as the way life goes there will come a time when “homeboy Joe” that dated my bestie from college will become the life partner and husband to my best friend.
And to be very honest, it warms my heart to envision the day my best friends walk down that aisle in their beautiful gowns with beaming smiles on their faces. I, of course, anticipate my ugly cry in the front while trying not to make a scene with all of my emotions. Tears of joy as well as a bit of sadness, because I know from here on out I will have to share my besties with a husband (as they become One), children (as they become a priority), and new friends (well they just come lol). Which I am certain I will love and adore just as much, (God I hope so) but I know in that very moment, the dynamics within all of our lives will change. The weekend getaways, random happy hours, “Friday Night Lights” and routines that manifested during our single years will have to come to an end or at the least slow down quite a bit.
But no poo faces guys. Who said the party had to stop?! Change may sometimes bring discomfort, but no one ever said that it would always be bad. I may divorce the dynamics of our friendship as single women, but I’ll also gain another brother/friend, God children that I can send home when I choose and let’s not forget an extended village for my own family to have. Weekend getaways will turn into group/ family trips, random happy hours will be replaced with birthday parties and well, Friday night lights will be replaced with swanky work events that we are able to attend when a baby sitter is available.
I’m divorcing my bestie because she deserves to marry the man of her dreams and experience the quality life that her heart desires. **insert heart emoji